Sunday, December 26, 2010

A 70s Christmas-Da Do Run Run

It was a 70s Christmas for me this year in 2010. I took a trip down memory lane as I went through my stocking. I had thrown a tiny tube of Strawberry Bonne Bell lip smacker (you mothers know that sometimes you have to add a bit to your own stocking) and I was back in the past. Right then and there, while wrapping paper fluttered around me, I smothered that lip gloss all over my mouth so I looked like a three-year old who just got into her big sister's "private stuff."
Smells bring back the strongest memories sometimes, and this smell took me to the Christmas when I got a GIANT tube of Bonne Bell lip smacker in my stocking with a Barry Manilow tape and of course the token orange. I was 13 then, but now I was back in time crooning, "Looks Like we Made It" by Barry Manilow, Shaun Cassidy's "Da Do Run Run Run,"and the Bee Gees's "Stayin' Alive."

I was back in disco class with my best friend Teresa at Cottonwood Elementary in Salt Lake City. The strobe lights were turning on the lunch room ceiling and I had on my bell bottoms. My back pocket was stuffed with that GIANT tube of Bonne Bell and an enormous Goody Comb so I could comb back my feathered hair. A cursive "E" hung from my neck. I had bought it at "Grand Central."

The Bee Gees were the living end, but Andy Gibb was the cutest, we all agreed. And there was no denying how we all felt when John Travolta had on those white pants."Well you can tell by the way I use my walk I'm a woman's man, no time to talk," I grooved. My braces were not the little "brackets" that they call braces today, they were BANDS, and they literally took up my entire mouth for a year and a half. I am sure they sparkled with the disco ball.

In 2010 in my own living room this 44-year old woman was remembering slobbering all over the cover of Shaun Cassidy's album, remembering how my Dad said his music was "asinine." And of course in the privacy of my own room I was weeping silently, "Oh Mandy, how you came and you gave without taking, but I sent you away, Oh Mandy, well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking AND I NEED YOU!" I played that song over and over and wondered if I could ever love anyone as much as Barry obviously loved Mandy, but more importanly would anyone ever love me like that?? I wanted to meet Mandy, this intensely loveable woman and get some tips from her. Sigh.

Back to the present. When we went to my sister in law's later on Christmas day, I said to her, "Look what I got!" I pulled the tube of lip smacker from my pocket and said, "Smell this." She smelled it and got this Oh, is there anything else in this life but this smell look on her face and then said quietly, "Can I put some on?" I nodded, thrilled to find another 70s chick who could appreciate my euphoria. It was just like junior high when your friend asked to share and you said yes, and your Mom said, "Don't share lip gloss!" and you told her that you only shared with Teresa, and she rolled her eyes. Such bad girls.

"The watermelon was amazing too!" we agreed. Next year, I'll take another trip with watermelon.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Winter Pants

An entire season has passed since I blogged last. It's gone from late summer to early winter in a flash. It's gone from the pool, to raking leaves, to carving pumpkins, to stuffing ourselves at Thanksgiving, to stuffing ourselves because it's December. Wow, how easy it is to measure the changing seasons by what you're eating and how your pants fit.

Morning Closet Ritual: Oh, it looks like I'm back in my winter pants. I wish I was still in my summer pants. Much bad lanugage. The only thing to do is put a sock in my mouth and scream bloody murder at the injustice of it all. Curse all the bakers and chocolate makers of the world! Especially those devils in Switzerland, the Linderball (sp?) makers. How dare they think they can control me! I'll show them. Then I spit the sock into the clothes hamper and walk out into broad daylight to face the world.


I did blog a bit on my PTA blog, lest any of you might think I had just become lazy. You could just click on it and then I could get my visitors up to 10 or so. That would be a nice thing to do for me since I am so sad about my winter pants.

But it looks like I might be clicking away again soon. It's not because my PTA blog has taken off and fulfilled its intended function--to provide an educational forum for parents--no not at all. Ha! I don't think there's a blog out there that has been more ignored by its intended audience than that one. I think my Mom read it once. Thanks Mom! I can always count on her!

I am going to be a part of "Mom Click," a weekly blogging section about parenting in the Provo Daily Herald. I will be writing about being a mother of teenagers, something I know nothing about but should after all this time. I seem to become worse at it the longer I do it. So if the Daily Herald is hoping for tips or words of wisdom, they have asked the wrong mama. I am struggling with basic communication skills with my teenagers, and I thought I learned to talk a long time ago, like about 43 years ago. Apparently not.

I will "discuss" this on Monday in the first issue of "Mom Click." It promises to be most educational. I don't have the link to that exciting section yet, but it will be forthcoming.

P.S. Goal for this week: Go in and out of the closet quickly. Avoid lingering there.